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Environmental ‘drive’ from First Choice
A gas-guzzling 80-seater coach is sent to pick up four journalists from a hotel. The destination: an early evening press conference to hear about TUI and First Choice’s environmental policy.
To be fair to First Choice, it was all the fault of one of the journalists. And First Choice do seem to genuinely care about carbon offsetting, while others know it as a convenient way for the middle classes to appease their consciences.
That wonderful, born again environmentalist Dermot Blastland, all fs and bs, berates Virgin Atlantic for their latest publicity stunt.
“Who the xxxx is going to pay for a xxxxxx offset while they’re sitting quaffing champage in Upper Class?” he asks bemused hacks.
And then to the beach party. A half-mile walk through a resort hotel, Shakespearian actors, a Beatles tribute band, a tap dancer and £40k of fireworks. And Justin Fleming. It could only be an ABTA welcome/farewell party.
Day 2: Half of Tenerife – the half which includes the convention centre – is suddenly thrown into darkness. Are we unwittingly part of 24 Series 9, with terrorists hatching a dastardly plan to bring down the island, as a sub-plot to taking over the world? No, it was the electricity board’s incompetence.
The sessions had to be put back half an hour (if only we could have had prior warning of the incompetence and stayed in bed) and journalists were powerless to make up their stories.
Eventually power and, over in the ‘masterclass’ session, CAA deputy director David Moesli is explaining how the £1 levy will be introduced.
Ah yes, came a voice from the floor, but how are you going to enforce it, as you have done precisely nothing against companies flouting bonding laws for the past five years?
“We’ve said we’re not here to debate what constitutes a package,” came the bizarre reply.
“That’s not the question,” was the retort.
Extraordinarily, Moesli then suggested that it was, in any case, a stupid question (can you guess who asked it?)
A schoolboy error from Moesli, considering the pen is mightier than his mouth and his boss, Richard Jackson, agreed enforcement was indeed crucial.
Great fun. And I even learned something new today.
Jeremy Skidmore
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